Robert's Sermons

Ephesians: Grace Changes Everything

11. Housekeeping

 

Today, as we continue our journey through the book of Ephesians, we come to a passage that provides instructions for Christian households. In today’s reading, Paul addresses the relationships between husbands and wives, parents and children, and masters and slaves. This passage is foundational for understanding how we are to live out our faith in our closest relationships, emphasizing mutual submission, love, respect, and integrity.

Ephesians 5:21-6:9  “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Saviour. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church – for we are members of his body. ‘For this reason, a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.’ This is a profound mystery – but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. ‘Honor your father and mother’ – which is the first commandment with a promise -‘so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.’ Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. Slaves, obey your earthly masters with respect and fear, and with sincerity of heart, just as you would obey Christ. Obey them not only to win their favour when their eye is on you, but as slaves of Christ, doing the will of God from your heart. Serve wholeheartedly, as if you were serving the Lord, not people, because you know that the Lord will reward each one for whatever good they do, whether they are slave or free. And masters, treat your slaves in the same way. Do not threaten them, since you know that he who is both their Master and yours is in heaven, and there is no favouritism with him.”

This passage can be divided into four main sections: the call to mutual submission (5:21), instructions for husbands and wives (5:22-33), instructions for children and parents (6:1-4), and instructions for slaves and masters (6:5-9). Each section provides us with practical guidance on how to live out our faith in our closest relationships, reflecting the love and grace of Christ.

The call to mutual submission (5:21)

Paul begins this passage with a foundational principle: “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.” This call to mutual submission sets the tone for the specific instructions that follow. It emphasizes the importance of humility, respect, and love in all our relationships.

Mutual submission is rooted in our reverence for Christ. As believers, we are called to follow the example of Jesus, who demonstrated the ultimate act of submission by laying down His life for us. Our submission to one another is an expression of our love for Christ and our desire to honour Him in all that we do. Mutual submission involves a willingness to put others’ needs and interests above our own. It requires us to cultivate an attitude of humility and to seek the well-being of others. This principle applies to all our relationships, whether in the home, the church, or the workplace.

Instructions for husbands and wives (5:22-33)

Paul provides specific instructions for husbands and wives, highlighting the importance of love and respect in marriage.

Wives: “Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Saviour. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.” Paul calls wives to submit to their husbands as they do to the Lord. This submission is not about inferiority or subjugation but about honouring the God-given order in the family. Just as the church submits to Christ, wives are called to submit to their husbands, recognizing their role as the head of the family. This submission is voluntary and motivated by love and respect. It reflects a desire to support and honour the husband’s leadership, fostering unity and harmony in the marriage.

Husbands: “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church – for we are members of his body.” Paul calls husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the church. This love is sacrificial, selfless, and unconditional. Just as Christ gave Himself up for the church, husbands are called to lay down their lives for their wives, seeking their well-being and spiritual growth. Husbands are to love their wives as their own bodies, providing for their needs and caring for them with tenderness and compassion. This love reflects the unity and oneness of marriage, where husband and wife are united as one flesh.

The Profound Mystery: “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.’ This is a profound mystery – but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.” Paul concludes this section by highlighting the profound mystery of marriage, which reflects the relationship between Christ and the church. The union of husband and wife is a picture of the unity and intimacy between Christ and His people. Paul summarizes his instructions with a call for husbands to love their wives and for wives to respect their husbands. Love and respect are essential for a healthy and thriving marriage, reflecting the character of Christ and His love for the church.

Instructions for children and parents (6:1-4)

Paul provides instructions for children and parents, emphasizing the importance of obedience, honour, and nurturing in the family.

Children: “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. ‘Honor your father and mother’ – which is the first commandment with a promise – so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.'” Paul calls children to obey their parents in the Lord, recognizing that this is the right and proper thing to do. Obedience to parents is an expression of respect and honour, reflecting the order and authority established by God in the family. Paul cites the fifth commandment, which comes with a promise of blessing: “Honour your father and mother so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.” Honouring parents leads to a flourishing and blessed life, reflecting the wisdom and goodness of God’s design for the family.

Fathers: “Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.” Paul addresses fathers specifically, calling them to nurture and guide their children without exasperating or provoking them to anger. Fathers are to provide loving discipline and instruction, helping their children grow in the knowledge and fear of the Lord. This involves creating an environment of love, encouragement, and support, where children can thrive and develop into mature and godly individuals. Fathers are called to be patient, understanding, and consistent in their parenting, reflecting the character of God the Father.

Instructions for slaves and masters (6:5-9)

Paul provides instructions for slaves and masters, emphasizing the importance of integrity, respect, and fairness in the workplace.

Slaves: “Slaves, obey your earthly masters with respect and fear, and with sincerity of heart, just as you would obey Christ. Obey them not only to win their favour when their eye is on you, but as slaves of Christ, doing the will of God from your heart. Serve wholeheartedly, as if you were serving the Lord, not people, because you know that the Lord will reward each one for whatever good they do, whether they are slave or free.” Paul calls slaves to obey their earthly masters with respect and sincerity, recognizing that their ultimate obedience is to Christ. Slaves are to serve wholeheartedly, as if they were serving the Lord, not people. This attitude transforms their work into an act of worship and service to God. Paul emphasizes that the Lord will reward each person for the good they do, whether they are slave or free. This assurance of divine reward provides motivation and encouragement for slaves to serve faithfully and diligently, knowing that their labour is not in vain.

Masters: “And masters, treat your slaves in the same way. Do not threaten them, since you know that he who is both their Master and yours is in heaven, and there is no favouritism with him.” Paul addresses masters, calling them to treat their slaves with respect and fairness, recognizing that they too have a Master in heaven. Masters are to avoid threatening or mistreating their slaves, understanding that they are accountable to God for their actions. This instruction challenges the prevailing cultural norms of the time and calls for a rather radical transformation in the relationship between masters and slaves. It emphasizes the equality and dignity of all people before God, who shows no favouritism.

Practical Applications:

Embrace mutual submission:

Reflect on the principle of mutual submission and consider how it can be applied in your relationships. Are there areas where you need to demonstrate more humility, respect, and love? Ask God to help you cultivate an attitude of mutual submission, seeking to honour and serve others out of reverence for Christ. In your marriage, strive to support and honour your spouse, recognizing their unique role and value. In your family, seek to nurture and guide your children with patience and understanding. In your workplace, treat your colleagues and employees with respect and fairness, recognizing their dignity and worth. Look for small, everyday opportunities to serve others in your family, church, and community. Whether it’s helping with household chores, volunteering at church, or offering assistance to a neighbour, these acts of service reflect an attitude of mutual submission. Practice active listening in your relationships, seeking to understand and empathize with others. This involves giving your full attention, asking questions, and showing genuine interest and concern. Active listening fosters mutual respect and strengthens relationships. Approach conflicts with a spirit of humility and a desire for reconciliation. Seek to understand the other person’s perspective and to find common ground. Use “I” statements to express your feelings and needs and work together to find a resolution that honours God and respects each other.

Foster love and respect in marriage:

Husbands, reflect on how you can love your wives as Christ loved the church. Consider ways to demonstrate sacrificial love, seeking the well-being and spiritual growth of your wife. Wives, reflect on how you can respect your husbands, honouring their leadership and supporting them in their role. Take time to communicate with your spouse and to understand their needs and desires. Pray together and seek God’s guidance in your marriage. Commit to loving and respecting each other, fostering unity and harmony in your relationship. Set aside regular time to spend with your spouse, engaging in activities that strengthen your relationship. This could be a weekly date night, a daily walk, or simply spending time together without distractions. Quality time fosters intimacy and connection. Look for opportunities to affirm and encourage your spouse. Express appreciation for their efforts and qualities and offer words of encouragement and support. Affirmation and encouragement build trust and strengthen the bond between husband and wife. Pray together and seek to grow spiritually as a couple. Study God’s Word together, attend church services and small groups, and support each other in your faith journey. Spiritual growth fosters unity and deepens your relationship with each other and with God.

Cultivate obedience and honour in the family:

Children, reflect on how you can obey and honour your parents, recognizing the wisdom and goodness of God’s design for the family. Parents, reflect on how you can nurture and guide your children without exasperating them. Create an environment of love, encouragement, and support, helping your children grow in the knowledge and fear of the Lord. Take time to listen to your children and to understand their needs and concerns. Provide loving discipline and instruction, helping them develop into mature and godly individuals. Pray for your children and seek God’s guidance in your parenting. Use positive reinforcement to encourage obedience and honour in your children. Praise and reward good behaviour and provide constructive feedback and guidance. Positive reinforcement fosters a sense of accomplishment and motivates children to continue growing in their faith and character. Model the behaviour you want to see in your children. Demonstrate respect, kindness, and obedience in your own actions and interactions. Children learn by observing their parents, so your example is a powerful tool for teaching and guiding them.

Practice integrity and respect in the workplace: Employees, reflect on how you can serve your employers with respect and sincerity, recognizing that your ultimate obedience is to Christ. Employers, reflect on how you can treat your employees with respect and fairness, recognizing their dignity and worth. In your work, strive to serve wholeheartedly, as if you were serving the Lord, not people. Recognize the value and importance of your work and seek to honour God in all that you do. Treat your colleagues and employees with kindness and respect, fostering a positive and supportive work environment. Strive for excellence in your work, doing your best in all tasks and responsibilities. Excellence reflects integrity and respect for your employer and colleagues. It also honours God, who calls us to do our work as unto Him. Invest in your professional development by seeking opportunities for growth and improvement. Attend workshops, take courses, and seek mentorship to enhance your skills and knowledge. Professional development demonstrates a commitment to integrity and excellence. Adhere to ethical practices in all aspects of your work. Be honest and transparent in your dealings and avoid actions that compromise your integrity. Ethical practices build trust and respect in the workplace and reflect the character of Christ.

Conclusion:

In this passage, Paul provides instructions for Christian households, emphasizing the importance of mutual submission, love, respect, and integrity in our closest relationships. We are called to honour and serve one another out of reverence for Christ, reflecting His love and grace in our interactions with family members, colleagues, and employees.

As we reflect on this passage, let us be inspired by Paul’s exhortation and encouraged by the transformation that God has brought about in our lives. Let us seek to live in a way that reflects our new identity in Christ, contributing to the growth and health of our families, churches, and workplaces.